Before diving into our break for this month, we’d like to take a moment to thank our guest blogger. We had a mommy anonymously submit to our President and we are more than grateful she felt confident enough to share her experience with us. Please feel free to share in your own 500-900 words your parenting experience to help mothers like her realize that she is not alone! WE are all experiencing these peaks and lows of motherhood and WE are all going to be OK!
The Break:
My entire pregnancy I was worried about Postpartum Depression.
While it was the last thing I wanted to add to my first time mommy plate, I knew there was a chance for me because I watched it run a course through my family. After I had her I waited for it to hit but it never did. I thought I was out of it. I had no baby blues, no sad thoughts, nothing of the nature, I was in pure bliss with my new baby girl. I was the happiest I think I’ve ever been. Then when she was about 9 months, I slowly felt my attitude changing. I didn’t care about doing things, nothing excited me, and nothing really gave me joy outside of being her mom.
I know Postpartum Depression is different for everyone. For example, when we think of PPD, the first thing we imagine is someone sad, depressed, or dragging along without caring for self. I was always told about the crying and sadness but no one really told me about the rage and destruction. I wouldn’t categorize myself as one of the moms who are overly sad or mad over anything. However, I do find myself quicker to anger these days, and there seems to be an overcast of emotion always following me. I don’t have a desire to do anything. I’m not upset with how my body has changed or that I’m a mother. I just can’t clearly pinpoint what would make me happy. What will get me out of this funk? I want to be happy; I really do. But there is something that isn’t wired right.
Everyone I have gotten advice from says talk about it, let your feelings out, but coming up in a family who has a terrible reputation with addiction will have you terrified to go to a specialist, with the idea of being prescribed anything. I refuse to be a part of that. Postpartum has been enough! Another reason it’s hard to let out and talk about is because I don’t have many words that explain how I feel. I just feel. I will say that some days are better than others. Some days the shadow is far away, other days it’s like I’m drowning in darkness. With all of this, I know it will pass. It has to pass. But I don’t know what to do, to get it pass.
Please share in the comments or find us on social media to share your thoughts for a chance to win $20 gift card this month!
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